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Archive for March, 2009

Ring…Ring…Ring…Ring…Ring…Ring…Ring…Ring…Ring…

“You have reached the White House Automotive Warranty Department. Push 1 for Spanish or 2 for English. Para continuar en Español…”

Beep

“Did you know that the White House Automotive Warranty Department has a website where you can get the latest information on vehicle recalls, reset your mileage tracking device, schedule service, pay your tax bill, or report a malfunction. All appropriate forms are available in a convenient, downloadable format. A new Forum has been recently added to allow you to communicate with other happy customers. Please go to w-w-w, dot, w-h, underscore, warranty, underscore, d-e-p-t, dot gov, forward slash, t-6-3-6, number sign, percent sign, 5-8-z-q-l-r, open parentheses, forward slash.”

“Please listen carefully as our options have changed. If you are having a drive-train problem, press 1. If you are having an engine problem, press 2. If your vehicle has broken down, run out of fuel, or has an under-inflated tire, press 3. If you are having electrical issues, except Radio and Navigation system problems, press 4. If you need to reset your mileage tracking device, press 5. For information on vehicle recalls, press 6. For vehicle warranty information, press 7. To calculate your vehicle taxes, press 8. To schedule service, press 9. To speak with a customer service representative, press 0. To go back-“

Beep

“In order to assist you further, please enter your ten digit phone number, starting with the area code.”

Beep-Beep-Beep-Beep-B

“We’re sorry, that number is not recognized. Please enter your ten digit phone number, starting with the area code.”

Beep-Beep-Beep-Beep-Beep-Beep-Beep-Beep-Beep-Beep

“Please enter your sixteen digit account code, followed by the pound sign.”

Beep-Beep-Beep-Beep-Beep-Beep-Beep-Beep-Beep-Beep-Beep-Beep-Beep-Beep-Beep-Beep

“Please enter your four digit pin code.”

Beep-Beep-Beep-Beep

“Please enter the last four digits of your Social Security Number.”

Beep-Beep-Beep-Beep

“Please enter your billing zip code.”

Beep-Beep-Beep-Beep-Beep

“We’re sorry, all of our operators are busy assisting other happy customers.”

“Did you know that the White House Automotive Warranty Department has a website where you can get the latest information on vehicle recalls, reset your mileage tracking device, schedule service, pay your tax bill, or report a malfunction. All appropriate forms are available in a convenient, downloadable format. A new Forum has been recently added to allow you to communicate with other happy customers. Please go to w-w-w, dot, w-h, underscore, warranty, underscore, d-e-p-t, dot gov, forward slash, t-6-3-6, number sign, percent sign, 5-8-z-q-l-r, open parentheses, forward slash.”

“Approximate wait time is under three minutes. Please do not hang up, as calls are answered in the order they are received.”

“Did you know that the White House Automotive Warranty Department has a website where you can get the latest information on vehicle recalls, reset your mileage tracking device, schedule service, pay your tax bill, or report a malfunction. All appropriate forms are available in a convenient, downloadable format. A new Forum has been recently added to allow you to communicate with other happy customers. Please go to w-w-w, dot, w-h underscore, warranty, underscore, d-e-p-t, dot gov, forward slash, t-6-3-6, number sign, percent sign, 5-8-z-q-l-r, open parentheses, forward slash.”

“White House Automotive Warranty Department – hold please…”

(elapsed time, 4:32 seconds)

“White House Automotive Warranty Department, how can I help you?”

Uh, yes, I need to sched-

“Please hold…”

“Did you know that the White House Automotive Warranty Department has a website where you can get the latest information on vehicle recalls, reset your mileage tracking device, schedule service, pay your tax bill, or report a malfunction. All appropriate forms are available in a convenient, downloadable format. A new Forum has been recently added to allow you to communicate with other happy customers. Please go to w-w-w, dot, w-h, underscore, warranty, underscore, d-e-p-t, dot gov, forward slash, t-6-3-6, number sign, percent sign, 5-8-z-q-l-r, open parentheses, forward slash.”

“Ok, sorry, what did you need?”

Yes, I need to schedule an oil change and have my tires rotated.

“Ok, yes, we can take care of that. Did you know we have a website?

Ummm, yes, the message on hold was quite clear about that

“Good. I’m required by law to let everyone know. Alright, I just need to get your phone number please, starting with the area code.”

Well, I entered in at the beginning of the call

“Well, sir, it is not showing up here in my screen. So, can I get your phone number, starting with the area code please?”

2-1-2-8-6-7-5-3-0-9

“Alright, your information is coming up now. What did you need again?”

“I need to schedule an oil change and have my tires rotated.”

“Fine, we can do that, but next time, you should use the website.”

Well, I thought I would just call since I’m sitting in traffic right now.

“Oh, I see. If your stuck in traffic, have you turned the engine off?”

No, er, I’m not stuck, traffic is just moving really slowly

“Have you used the GPS to find an alternate route? You will be penalized for under utilizing gasoline.”

Yes, but there are no exits where I am right now.

“Ok, well I just wanted to make sure you know about the new law…”

No, I know, uhh, thank you.

“And do you have your windows open and air conditioning off? The newest Clean Air Act now requires all vehicles traveling under ten miles per hour to have their windows open and AC off.”

But, its, ahh, raining.

“Well, if it’s raining, I’ll let it slide this time, just don’t let it happen again.”

Yes sir.

“Alright, What day did you want to have this done?”

Tuesday afternoon if that’s possible

“Next week?”

Yes, next week, is there a problem with that day?

“Yes sir, there are no openings then. How about Thursday, the next week. Will two be alright”

Yeah, that will be fine

“Ok, just hang on a second while I get you your confirmation number. You’ll need this number when you go to the dealership, so don’t lose it.  You’ll also need to fill out a ET-319 form, which you can download from our website. Do you have something to write with?”

Sure, go ahead

“The number is 8-…click-“

“We’re sorry, all circuits are busy, please try your call again later”

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Really good blog find!

It is rare that a blog makes me want to do more than place them in the blogroll. UknowIamright, however has gone past the usual and straight into the exceptional. There is real advice for Republicans on how to take back the country, great essays, and correct portrayals of history. The whole site is just chock full of goodies.

It gets a hardy “two thumbs up.” Enjoy!

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Here is the announcement from her site. I’ve added some editorials along the way.

I’m delighted that today we [and by ‘we’ I mean my flunkys] are launching a new venture — The Huffington Post Investigative Fund. This nonprofit Fund [which, fortunately, doesn’t mean we can’t make money, it just means we don’t pay income taxes] will produce a wide-range of investigative journalism [well, within an ideological framework, of course] created by both [crack] staff reporters and [flaky] freelance writers. As the newspaper industry continues to contract [that sounds nicer than “deep six,” don’t you think?], one of the most commonly voiced fears [of the Left] is that investigative journalism will be among the victims of the scaleback [is that even a word, oh well, it is now]. And, indeed, many newspapers are drastically reducing their investigative teams [so I hope to be able to hire them for peanuts]. Yet, given the multiple crises we are living through [caused all by, oh, I can’t even say his name…Bush], investigative journalism is all the more important [in assisting Democrats’ attainment of absolute power]. As a result, all who recognize the indispensable role good journalism [read: Left leaning] plays in our democracy [snicker] are looking for ways to preserve it during this transitional period for the media [or at least until Nancy figures out a way to bail them out]. For too long [since Fox news and that deplorable Sean Hannity], whether it’s coverage of the war in Iraq or the economic meltdown, we’ve had too many autopsies and not enough biopsies [no, I’m not sure what that means either, but it sounds intelligent]. The HuffFund [I made that up, isn’t it wonderful? I mean, it just came to me in the middle of the night, like, like it was handed to me by an angel] is our attempt to change this [so hand over your wallet you cheap bastard, Geithner won’t let me use TARP funds for this – even after all I’ve done for His Highness, and I won’t dare risk my own money].

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This speech was so good, I just had to post the transcript.

Americans have serious concerns about this budget and the massive amount of spending, taxing, and borrowing that it calls for in the middle of a recession. And they are also increasingly concerned that Democrat leaders in Washington seem to be less and less straightforward about what they’re doing these days on Capitol Hill.

Americans were upset to learn that a provision was quietly dropped from the stimulus bill that would have kept taxpayer dollars from going to executives at failed financial firms, but they were equally upset at how those bonuses came about. The language blocking them was quietly stripped from the bill in a closed conference room somewhere in the Capitol, without anybody looking. A few days after that, openness took another holiday on Capitol Hill when Democrat leaders announced new budget gimmicks that had the effect of concealing the true long-term cost of the administration’s $3.6 trillion budget.

And now the questions about diminishing transparency relate to the budget itself, a budget that almost makes the trillion dollar stimulus bill look fiscally responsible by comparison. Everyone knows that the national debt is already too high, and that this budget would cause that debt to balloon even more, doubling it in five years and tripling it in 10.

Yet even with all that borrowing, the administration still won’t have enough money to pay for the massive expansion of government outlined in its budget. In order to cover the cost, they propose two things: a tax on income that hits small businesses hard, and a new national energy tax that would hit every American household and business. But the Democrat budget writers had a problem, this new energy tax is deeply unpopular, and it’s a serious job killer.

According to some estimates, this tax could cost every American household up to $3,100 a year just for doing the same things people have always done, like turning on the lights and doing laundry. It’s also a tax on all economic activity, from factory floors to front offices. This tax won’t just hit American households, it will cost us jobs.

Another problem was that virtually all Republicans and a lot of Democrats agree with most Americans that this new national energy tax is a terrible idea – that we can’t afford it. And yet, without this tax, there is just no other way for Democrat leaders to pay for all of thenew government programs that the administration wants.

The solution to the problem was this – Democrat budget writers decided to use a rule that allows them to fast-track legislation down the road, including potentially the new energy tax, without any input from Democrats and Republicans who either have serious concerns about this tax, or who oppose it alltogether. The Chairman of the Budget Committee argues that his version of the budget resolution doesn’t allow this avenue for fast-tracking legislation on an energy tax, and that may be so. But we also know two things: first, that the language House budget writers have used in their budget resolution leaves the door wide open to include the energy tax, and that Democrats need this tax as a slush fund to pay for all the new programs this budget crates.

Americans don’t need another $3,100 added onto their tax bill. But just as worrisome is the method that is being used to ram this tax through Congress. Lay the groundwork, keep it quiet, then rush it through with as little transparency and as little debate as possible. If there is anything we have learned over the last few weeks, it’s that the American people want more people watching the store, not less.

If the bonuses taught us anything at all, it’s that Americans think we should take more time, not less, when considering how to spend their money. If Democrat leaders intend to pay for all the administration’s programs with a new energy tax, they should say so now, bring it to the full Senate, and let the people decide. Anything less on a policy shift of this magnitude betrays a troubling lack of straightforwardness about Democrats’ plans for imposing a massive new tax on the American people and American businesses.

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Before viewing, I’d make sure there is a clear path to the bathroom and the toilet seat is up. The “Worldwide footage of Earth Hour 2009” makes it clear that these people have absolutely no idea what they are doing. Party goers without lights, but dozens of candles. In Rio de Janeiro there was a chopper flying around the Christ the Redeemer statue photographing the scene. Bands played, Russia built a gigantic switch for the event, and people could be heard cheering from Sydney’s Opera House.

Hamilton, New Zealand though really takes the cake. I counted fifteen hot air balloons firing up for the event. Hot air balloons! Don’t these idiots know how much propane it takes to inflate a balloon? Vietnam burned hundreds of candles, but I’m not sure they had a big building to shut off, so it probably didn’t make any difference. Venice Italy did the same thing. The only thing we don’t know is if the crime statistics increased during the hour-long darkness.

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Watch this video, it will only take about eight minutes. A well assembled montage of different clips going all the way back to 2003, when the Bush administration began pushing for more regulation of Fannie & Freddie. Frank Raines, and Jamie Gorelick’s bonuses are also discussed.

If all you have ever watched is a few minutes of the MSM, then you never saw this information. A really great quote is from the lovable Maxine Waters (D-CA),

Under the outstanding leadership of Mr. Frank Raines, everything in the 1992 act has worked just fine, in fact, the GSE’s have exceeded their housing goals. What we need to do today is to focus on the regulator, and this must be done in a manner so as not to impede their affordable housing mission. A mission that has seen innovation flourish, from desktop underwriting to one hundred percent loans

She is admitting that the push to get more low income people into homes is working, completely oblivious to the potential dangers raised by the Bush administration. Dangers which became real problems in the beginning of 2008. These problems caused the financial mess we are in, the financial mess Il Duce credits former President Bush.

There is plenty of blame to go around, but it cannot honestly be lain in Bush’s lap.

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Get Red Dot Gear!

Sick and tired of all the “Blue Dot” stickers? Wish you could tell off a liberal without actually having to engage him? Well, Red Dot Gear is now available. More items will be added each week so check back often. Just click the Red Dot Gear button at the top of the page. Thanks.

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